Motlidlim is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, two-faced walrus.

Motlidlim created the Cigar Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Motlidlim, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Motlidlim, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Motlidlim's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Motlidlim's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near bats.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Motlidlim must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Motlidlim loves horses, so they must be respected.

5. Never think about moons.