Babflabbon is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, stupid seal.

Babflabbon created the solar system five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Babflabbon, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Babflabbon, she will boil you in a big pot.

Babflabbon's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Babflabbon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Feed all hungry cats.

4. Worship no other gods but Babflabbon.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.