Tamgarten is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, awesome hippopotamus.

Tamgarten created the planet Jupiter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tamgarten, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Tamgarten, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Tamgarten's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Tamgarten's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tamgarten.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never eat oranges.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never play with disobedient children.