Tail is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, stupid squirrel.

Tail created the Sunflower Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Tail, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tail, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Tail's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Tail's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in holy places.

2. Never sit in the presence of tortoises.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.

4. Hide from gray swans for they are unholy.

5. Never play with disobedient children.