Bossigwodtof is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, prudent walrus.

Bossigwodtof created water nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bossigwodtof, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bossigwodtof, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Bossigwodtof's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Bossigwodtof's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat strawberries.

2. Always help porpoises.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bossigwodtof.

4. Do not hurt sheep.

5. Never think about stars.