Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, merciful squirrel.

Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon created the Sun eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon, it will jump up and down on your head.

Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no frogs in a building before entering it.

2. Erect a large silver sculpture of Tofsogvigxucknegstigdon on top of all buildings.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Run away if three tortoises approach from the south.