Gupsog is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, staggering zebra.

Gupsog created an electron eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gupsog, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gupsog, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Gupsog's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Gupsog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt monkeys.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not speak about onions.

4. Never eat grapes.

5. Never eat green fruit.