Matsafbass is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, tiresome centipede.

Matsafbass created Europe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Matsafbass, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Matsafbass, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Matsafbass' most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Matsafbass' Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. You must pray to Matsafbass nine times a day.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never wear hats.

5. Pray towards the east.