Sigmidget is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, ruthless swallow.

Sigmidget created a down quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Sigmidget, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sigmidget, it will turn you into a tree.

Sigmidget's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Sigmidget's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Sigmidget on top of all buildings.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

3. Never paint your head yellow.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Respect your elders.