Sugdogfum is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, all-powerful cow.

Sugdogfum created the planet Saturn two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sugdogfum, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Sugdogfum, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Sugdogfum's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Sugdogfum's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate goats.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sugdogfum.

3. You must pray to Sugdogfum seven times a day.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.