Bellflatrig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, stupid rhinoceros.

Bellflatrig created the Whirlpool Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bellflatrig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bellflatrig, it will come to you in dreams.

Bellflatrig's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Bellflatrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head cyan.

2. Do not take Bellflatrig's name in vain.

3. Never think about black holes.

4. Never bounce in the presence of swans.

5. Never look in ponds.