Cadhashivlim is a god.

He takes the form of a large, irritating lizard.

Cadhashivlim created dark energy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Cadhashivlim, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cadhashivlim, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Cadhashivlim's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Cadhashivlim's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Hide from violet pigs for they are unholy.

4. Great tits are not to be trusted.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.