Xenkabvil is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, omnipotent butterfly.

Xenkabvil created Europe two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xenkabvil, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Xenkabvil, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Xenkabvil's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Xenkabvil's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if five tapirs approach from the north.

2. Always make sure there are no snakes in a room before entering it.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Never go into black rooms.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.