Flatnurtjin is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, charitable butterfly.

Flatnurtjin created the planet Venus four million years ago.

If you believe in Flatnurtjin, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Flatnurtjin, it will turn you into a worm.

Flatnurtjin's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Flatnurtjin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear titanium on your body.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Never write about planets.

4. Always help eagles in need.

5. Pray towards the south.