Cabvonkik is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, weak finch.

Cabvonkik created the Small Magellanic Cloud six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabvonkik, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cabvonkik, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Cabvonkik's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Cabvonkik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt eagles.

2. Do not wear green clothing.

3. Do not bounce in public.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Do not make images of living things.