Flowboparf is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, irritating alligator.

Flowboparf created the Milkyway eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flowboparf, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Flowboparf, she will turn you into a mole.

Flowboparf's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Flowboparf's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Flowboparf on top of all buildings.

2. Retreat if five manatees approach from the east.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.