Gargarhak is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, smart jackal.

Gargarhak created the planet Mars three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gargarhak, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gargarhak, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Gargarhak's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Gargarhak's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not shave your legs.

4. Feed all hungry ducks.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.