Basttafnel is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, witless hydra.

Basttafnel created energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Basttafnel, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Basttafnel, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Basttafnel's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Basttafnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never talk about mites.

3. Do not kill grasshopers.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Great tits are unholy and should not be approached.