Cenbarncat is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, thoughtless frog.

Cenbarncat created the cosmos twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cenbarncat, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cenbarncat, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Cenbarncat's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Cenbarncat's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never hurt whales.

3. Always help porpoises.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never look in ponds.