Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, emotional beaver.

Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol created an atom four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol, he will be mildly annoyed.

Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Fedontlistominmumbumyok Bisscimvol's name in vain.

2. Always help doves.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never eat bark.