Pogsaslik is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, cheerful dugong.

Pogsaslik created a down quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogsaslik, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Pogsaslik, it will turn you into a duck.

Pogsaslik's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Pogsaslik's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

3. You must pray to Pogsaslik eight times a day.

4. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.