Wodvonbencusscimkem is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, boastful cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Wodvonbencusscimkem created carbon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Wodvonbencusscimkem, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Wodvonbencusscimkem, she will turn you into a plant.

Wodvonbencusscimkem's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Wodvonbencusscimkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat limes.

2. Always help sick aardvarks.

3. Do not take Wodvonbencusscimkem's name in vain.

4. You must never eat corn.

5. Retreat if nine dolphins approach from the south.