Cibpibxuck Toncisshas is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, uncaring mouse.

Cibpibxuck Toncisshas created bats nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cibpibxuck Toncisshas, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cibpibxuck Toncisshas, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cibpibxuck Toncisshas' most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Cibpibxuck Toncisshas' Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cibpibxuck Toncisshas.

3. Retreat if nine aardvarks approach from the west.

4. Always make sure there are no snails in a building before entering it.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.