Jigpadpid is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, ruthless human.

Jigpadpid created Asia seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jigpadpid, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Jigpadpid, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Jigpadpid's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Jigpadpid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt squirrels.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Jigpadpid on top of all buildings.

3. Always help goats.

4. Always help gulls in need.

5. Do not chop down trees.