Bepnatcad is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, slow gerbil.

Bepnatcad created a charm quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bepnatcad, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bepnatcad, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Bepnatcad's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Bepnatcad's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no ducks in a building before entering it.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Erect a large silver sculpture of Bepnatcad on top of all buildings.

4. Always help squirrels.

5. Always obey Bepnatcad's priests.