Rotnellbum is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, unthoughtful spider.

Rotnellbum created the cosmos three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rotnellbum, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Rotnellbum, it will turn you into a slug.

Rotnellbum's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Rotnellbum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip in public.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Run away from purple hamsters, for they are unholy.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not trade with those who eat bread.