Sandtarxuck is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, ill-tempered tortoise.

Sandtarxuck created the world eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Sandtarxuck, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Sandtarxuck, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Sandtarxuck's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Sandtarxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near monkeys.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never mention whales.

4. Run away from pink squirrels, for they are unholy.

5. Never eat green fruit.