Xucklak Camnarthot is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, ill-tempered cow.

Xucklak Camnarthot created the Black Eye Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xucklak Camnarthot, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Xucklak Camnarthot, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Xucklak Camnarthot's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Xucklak Camnarthot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Great tits are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never run in the presence of sheep.

4. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.