Arnvoggesscud is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, vain octopus.

Arnvoggesscud created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Arnvoggesscud, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Arnvoggesscud, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Arnvoggesscud's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Arnvoggesscud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never eat bread.

3. Never mention gulls.

4. Always help porpoises in need.

5. Never wear indigo tights.