Gud Ingwegrap is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, intelligent newt.

Gud Ingwegrap created energy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gud Ingwegrap, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gud Ingwegrap, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Gud Ingwegrap's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Gud Ingwegrap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Never bounce in the presence of great tits.

3. You must love Gud Ingwegrap.

4. Never paint your face indigo.

5. Mites are unholy and should not be approached.