Loopbognillun is a god.

He takes the form of a small, omnipotent shrew.

Loopbognillun created a charm quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loopbognillun, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Loopbognillun, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Loopbognillun's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Loopbognillun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair orange.

2. Always help tapirs in need.

3. Erect a large iron sculpture of Loopbognillun on top of all buildings.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not commit murder.