Pignibnul is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, awesome raccoon.

Pignibnul created the universe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pignibnul, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Pignibnul, he will destroy your home solar system.

Pignibnul's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Pignibnul's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always obey Pignibnul's priests.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not speak about garlic.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.