Danlenapp is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, proud weasel.

Danlenapp created matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Danlenapp, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Danlenapp, he will boil you in a big pot.

Danlenapp's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Danlenapp's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt mites.

2. Hide from magenta otters for they are unholy.

3. Hide if five shrews approach from the south.

4. Always help great tits in need.

5. Never talk about fire.