Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, calm unicorn.

Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab created Europe six billion years ago.

If you believe in Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab, she will manifest in front of you.

Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Teenhunsan Fenkennull Vildidmab.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not speak about turnips.

4. Never eat pineapples.

5. Never go into magenta rooms.