Hinripgut is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, vain cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Hinripgut created tapeworms two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinripgut, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Hinripgut, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Hinripgut's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Hinripgut's Holy Commandments

1. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Worship no other gods but Hinripgut.

3. Do not speak about limes.

4. Erect four lead sculptures of Hinripgut on top of important buildings.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.