Mumbestkem is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, charitable mink.

Mumbestkem created the planet Saturn seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mumbestkem, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Mumbestkem, he will remove you from existence.

Mumbestkem's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Mumbestkem's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Run away from black turtles, for they are unholy.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.