Hitstipceb Lenboss is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, dishonourable capybara.

Hitstipceb Lenboss created parasitic wasps two million years ago.

If you believe in Hitstipceb Lenboss, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hitstipceb Lenboss, he will turn you into a rock.

Hitstipceb Lenboss' most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Hitstipceb Lenboss' Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry tortoises.

2. Whales are not to be trusted.

3. Never think ill of sick turtles.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Fast once a month.