Rownakfar is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, dishonourable dog.

Rownakfar created an atom two billion years ago.

If you believe in Rownakfar, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rownakfar, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Rownakfar's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Rownakfar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always help manatees in need.

3. Never wear turquoise ear rings.

4. Worship no other gods but Rownakfar.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.