Gamnakkem is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, awe-inspiring gnu.

Gamnakkem created silver five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gamnakkem, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gamnakkem, she will destroy your favourite star.

Gamnakkem's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Gamnakkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick sharks.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. You must pray to Gamnakkem six times a day.

4. Never mention birds.

5. Put Gamnakkem first in all things.