Wapmegkom is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, happy walrus.

Wapmegkom created bats nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapmegkom, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wapmegkom, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Wapmegkom's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Wapmegkom's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never paint your back indigo.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wapmegkom.

4. Never wear violet trousers.

5. Retreat if four horses approach from the east.