Larphambem is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, witless crab.

Larphambem created a bottom quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Larphambem, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Larphambem, he will turn you into a frog.

Larphambem's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Larphambem's Holy Commandments

1. Larphambem loves eagles, so they must be respected.

2. Always help foxes in need.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never go into brown rooms.