Fomzancad is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, egotistical narwhal.

Fomzancad created matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Fomzancad, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Fomzancad, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Fomzancad's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Fomzancad's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never skip near whales.

4. Do not shave your chest.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.