Likcapkomzed is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, thoughtless ant.

Likcapkomzed created a photon three million years ago.

If you believe in Likcapkomzed, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Likcapkomzed, it will turn you into a duck.

Likcapkomzed's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Likcapkomzed's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never sing near goats.

5. Never think ill of sick moths.