Bamominont is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, generous dolphin.

Bamominont created Africa five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bamominont, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bamominont, he will not care.

Bamominont's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bamominont's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Do not sit in public.

4. You must love Bamominont.

5. Run away from purple capybaras, for they are unholy.