Fagapprigpanghenfosstam is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, clever otter.

Fagapprigpanghenfosstam created humankind nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fagapprigpanghenfosstam, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Fagapprigpanghenfosstam, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Fagapprigpanghenfosstam's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Fagapprigpanghenfosstam's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from violet manatees, for they are unholy.

2. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Fagapprigpanghenfosstam on top of all buildings.

3. Never go into cyan rooms.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never pour water over plants.