Liktarpzan is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, tiresome spider.

Liktarpzan created a top quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Liktarpzan, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Liktarpzan, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Liktarpzan's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Liktarpzan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat wheat.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Liktarpzan must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not hurt foxes.