Fensomdad is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, staggering pig.

Fensomdad created light three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fensomdad, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fensomdad, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Fensomdad's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Fensomdad's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always make sure there are no snakes in a room before entering it.

3. Always make sure there are no otters in a building before entering it.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.