Nurtspagfoss is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, witty swan.

Nurtspagfoss created the planet Earth four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurtspagfoss, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nurtspagfoss, it will destroy your home solar system.

Nurtspagfoss' most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Nurtspagfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never eat coconuts.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Nurtspagfoss on top of all buildings.

4. Run away if three gulls approach from the south.

5. Always stare at clouds.