Rillsansom is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, slow hydra.

Rillsansom created matter five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rillsansom, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Rillsansom, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Rillsansom's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Rillsansom's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear boots.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always make sure there are no sharks in a room before entering it.

4. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always help porpoises.