Monbestsitwod is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, dishonest hippopotamus.

Monbestsitwod created silver nine million years ago.

If you believe in Monbestsitwod, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Monbestsitwod, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Monbestsitwod's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Monbestsitwod's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Do not kill aardvarks.

4. Monbestsitwod must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.